Monday is, much to my surprise, Memorial Day.
(Okay quick sidetrack: I know, I know, I “should” not be surprised by that fact but, dang it, we have dates on the calendar for a reason! The last Monday in May?! Who thought of that?! How am I supposed to remember that!?!? Huh?
Nobody remembers important things that way! Nobody. We don’t say “Yeah my birthday is the fourth Sunday after the Vernal Equinox” or “Make sure to clear your calendar for the second Friday following the fifth full moon before Cancer descends on the horizon, because we are having a picnic! Bring Hot Dog Fixin’s!”
No! Only bureaucrats who have nothing better to do than look at a calendar and hope they actually ARE closer to their retirement would decide that a holiday should move around like that. Okay, bureaucrats and ancient priestly orders devoted to the study of precise astrological phenomena.
Out in the real world we remember when things happen by using a convenient system as shown below:
Somebody says, “Hey, there is a new movie coming out June 9th. Wanna see it?”
Then the other person says, “What day is that?”
Then the first person says, “I don’t know. A Friday I guess. Maybe we should look it up?”
Then the first guy says, “Okay.”
SEE! It makes perfect sense! We have a calendar that tells us what day of the week the day of the year fall on. And that day of the year is chosen based on the position of the Earth in relation to the Sun. Doesn’t that make sense? Sidetrack over.)
Thank Heavens though Monday will be Memorial Day, a day for us to honor those who lost their lives in our country’s wars and while serving in the military. If there is any reason to have a national holiday that would be it. Why one of the best ways to tell if a people will survive, in my opinion, is to notice how they honor their war dead.
Which is what I particularly like about Memorial Day. For all of our ridiculous weepy, teary eyed moaning and groaning over the horrors of war when it comes to Memorial Day we celebrate our war dead the right way, with food burned with fire and sporting events and new entertainments, the way the Ancient Greeks did!
Sure they made sacrifice and did track and field naked and gave speeches about the dead while we grill out and barbecue, watch the Indy 500, and go see the latest summer blockbuster. And sure, we don’t do any of those things to honor the dead or to remind ourselves of the excellence they exemplified, we do them to have fun and to put off going back to work (if we get the day off.)
I know that kind of angers a lot of people. They view our playing around as disrespectful and forgetful of the sacrifices made by our fallen heroes. And that is true. Unabashedly true. But at least I have to wonder if the ponderously sad and endless sorrow that so many people display at these times of remembrance isn’t more disrespectful. Those who died in the wars died heroes! They were warriors, not victims and they should be praised for being warriors! They are the great and honorable and they should be remembered in their strength and courage, not wept over like a bunch of children who got lost in the woods and couldn’t find their way out. We should remember all of the enemies they killed and the great deeds they did and be proud of them and their sacrifice. I have no idea how solemn, weeping, head bowed, misty eyed wreath laying services do that.
But I am glad anyways! Maybe when we are cooking out and playing Frisbee football we aren’t communicating our values (or maybe we actually are communicating our real values) but who knows, maybe if there is some Elysium in Heaven for our war dead will be joining us in our celebration of life and deeds and their life and deeds.
I hope so. And I know on Monday when I lift my hamburger from the grill to my mouth I’ll remember to thank each and everyone of them for letting me enjoy it.

-Bob

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